There's No Place Like Home

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We just returned from a trip back home to Ohio. My son, John is being stationed in Italy and we attended the family reunion/going away party for him. It was so wonderful to see him again and his family.

The time was hectic to travel but we arrived safely in Detroit and drove into Toledo. The area looks better than the last time we were there two years ago for a funeral. This time we went back under much better circumstances. We stayed with my sister, Linda in her home near Maumee. The children stayed with their cousin Niki in their beautiful home. It was so nice to catch up with family and eat home cooking again!

We ate twice at the fabulous Tony Packo's cafe. They have the best hot dogs and chili ever as featured on the TV show, "Mash". We also visited with the entire Zion clan at Max & Erma's restaurant.

Mom & Dad looked great and are eager to visit us again in California. The kids enjoyed visiting with their cousins. It's amazing to see how my nieces and nephews are now parents with children of their own. The family continues to grow. I do wish I could say they are growing and prospering. But the truth is the Ohio/Michigan area still continues to be plagued with no jobs and many home foreclosures. Marriages break up and childhood dreams seem to vanquish into Neverland. My heart aches for them but there is nothing I can do. We all make choices in this life and then we have to live with the choices we have made. Many times we don't get a second chance to make things better.

California still suffers from the same thing but when the sun is shining and folks are still eating at restaurants, getting spa treatments, gambling in Vegas and making movies, it seems that recovery here will come sooner rather than later.

I hope that things will turn around soon. I hope that I'll be in the financial position of being able to fly my parents out again soon and treat them to a wonderful weekend in San Francisco. They are in their 80s now and we don't know how much longer they will be with us. My responsibilities are to my husband and my children.

Leaving a home to find new opportunities in a different part of the country takes courage and fortitude. It is the stuff that made this country what it is today. Is it difficult being away from family? Yes, but this is a choice we made many years ago and a choice we live with today. We are happy and our children seem to be happy and they must now go after things in life that will fulfill their needs. I can't make those choices for them but I hope that they see that their life is in their hands and they have the power to have choices. Education is the key. Finding your bliss is the key. Finding someone to love and to love you is the key. Taking care of your body and your spiritual soul is the key. Giving to others is the key. I have learned many things going back home to Ohio. I miss my family and I miss my friends but there truly is no place like home.

Why? Why?

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I'm feeling a little mischievous today. Yesterday I spent a long day in L.A. I had to meet with a new photographer and get some new head shots. Now, I think I look a little like Sandra Oh, Margaret Cho or Connie Chung. See where I am going with this? I tend to look Asian even though I am Latina. Why, oh why am I unhappy with the way I look? I think I still see the girl from high school. But those days are over and now I have to learn to adjust to the way I look now. Next step is waiting for input from my Agent and then I will decide which of the two favorite photos to use. I don't need a ton just one or two new head shots and I'll go from there.

Doing some cleaning today, catching up on laundry and trying not to overdo it. I read today in Polio Today that there is a voice recognition software program that types for you. Wow, I've not heard of that before and what a blessing that would be. It seems like the cost is around $200 and maybe I can one on eBay. And to think when I went to high school my major was Business Stenography. With this software program you can actually dictate and it types for you. So high school was wrong, I never even used stenography. Well, I did it for me. Sometimes I would go to meetings or I would conduct an interview and the speaker would talk so fast. Then my brain would flip it over to stenography. It's great cause no one else can read it but me. Another dying art form I think.

Where are my leg braces? I haven't been using them as much as I should and I think I will get them out. I was in two episodes of the Teen Nick show, "The Fresh Beat Band". We filmed over at Paramount Studios and they wanted me to wear my leg braces and use my wheelchair. So you should look for me to appear soon. Can't miss me!

There is a chill in the air which means another hot bubble bath for me. I am not too happy with my hair right now. I like long hair but it really does not do anything for me. And if I cut it too short, then yes I really look Asian instead of Latin.

Well, the house is clean. The cats are napping and the laundry is done. Time for my bubble bath, leg braces and maybe watching a pay per view movie. My hubby is on vacation this week so we will spend some quality time together. Life is good.

Thanks, Jack

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I am not ashamed to say that I loved getting up early on Saturday morning to watch cartoons with my brothers & sisters. When you only have one television set and 7 brothers and sisters negotiations must be made or there will be blood! Just kidding, but my family knew that I had to watch that cute boy, Jack Wild in H.R. Pufnstuf every Saturday.

The first time I saw "Oliver" I was in love with Jack. I read Oliver Twist and saw the previews to Oliver coming to our local theater. I love musicals and I believe at the time I was babysitting or raking leaves for personal money to buy records and go to movies. I just didn't ask my parents for money because I knew the answer would be no. So we earned our money and good Catholic school girls that we were, we did our homework first, then our chores before we could ask to go out to the movies. Now I didn't know anyone who loves musicals as much as I did, so I believe I did go see this movie by myself.

Well, to be 16 years old and to be nominated for Best Supporting Actor is not too shabby. Jack was amazing and shortly thereafter was hired to be in H.R. Pufnstuf. I followed his career by buying the teen magazines. I read how he was discovered playing soccer in his neighborhood. I read how he came to Hollywood with his brother, Arthur. Where were his parents, I wondered? Guess they stayed in England.

Jack Wild was featured in the teen magazines and he talked about Hollywood, girls and just being Jack. I remember seeing a photo of him sitting under the Santa Monica Pier sign and thinking, I'm going to go there someday! I remember his laughter and his shaggy hair. I remember buying his beautiful records and going to see the movie, H. R. Pufnstuf.

I wrote fan letters and even joined the Jack Wild fan club. I screamed with joy when I received a postcard from the fan club with an autographed photo. Perhaps the joy of being a teenager, the dreams of Hollywood and a boy named Jack is what I recall the most.

Jack taught me that we can all dream. Jack shared his world with us and thus opened up a new world outside of Toledo, Ohio. I continued my love of acting, musical theater, british accents, travel and the joy of laughter.

I frequently travel to Los Angeles for auditions and for work. On one particular sunny day after an audition, I had some time and went to Santa Monica. I parked my car and walked under that Santa Monica Pier sign. I walked all the way to the end of the pier and rode the huge ferris wheel. I looked out into the beautiful blue Pacific Ocean.

Jack Wild died several years ago from cancer. He lost the ability to speak and we shall no longer hear his beautiful voice. I was sad to hear that his health suffered after years of smoking and alcohol abuse. I wish I could have met Jack at least once. But he did bring joy to many and brought hope and dreams into my life. He showed us how beautiful life could be and how dreams can come true. And all I can say is, thanks Jack!

Who Does She Think She Is?

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I was watching Charles Osgood this Sunday morning and I had to laugh at one of the stories. Comedians were laughing and reading aloud from celebrity autobiographies. Hilarious! Kinda like the Vagina Monologues from Eve Ensler but funny stories told by the celebrities own true words. One example was Vanna White talking about how Merv Griffin hired her over 200 other women because she turned the letters better than the others! Who does she think she is? You are turning letters, Vanna. It's not brain surgery. Ha!

A nice quiet Sunday morning. Woke up with arm pain again. Although it is not like the leg pains I was getting last night. One minute we were watching the "Godfather" and it ended. Next thing I know my hubby is telling me I was out like a light and it's time to go to bed. He helped me stand and helped me walk over to the bed. That is the last thing I remembered till I woke up at 6:30.

My kitten is by my side keeping me company. I am wearing my favorite pink long johns, white anklets, and a pink sweater. I also have a blanket over me. So much fun having polio.

Tomorrow I drive into Los Angeles to meet with photographer, Johnny Pena. His photos are amazing and he is giving a discount to all of the actors who are represented by the Daily Talent Agency. Yay! I thanked him profusely because most people say they would love to do some acting but they have no idea how difficult it is and how most of us are starving artists. I have worked on so many projects for free to gain some experience and knowledge. We take classes, work in theater, put on productions, volunteer our efforts and all for the love of performing and learning from each other. There is nothing like performing and hearing the applause. It is such a high. And I am big on helping other women too. I was supposed to go to Santa Ana to see a one-woman show but my polio got the best of me again and I had to stay home. Sure enough, by 10 pm I was out for the count.

I'm looking forward to new headshots. This guy that I just started working with said I don't like your current headshot. It looks like you're a Mom. I said, I am a Mom! You are? Yes, I am! I am not the Pamela Anderson type. I am not the Meg Ryan type. I am not the Salma Hyeck type. I am more like Betty Rubble to Wilma. I am Rosie O'Donnell to Meg Ryan in "Sleepless in Seattle". And you know, I like that. I am your best friend and closest confidante. If your newest haircut looks like shit, I will tell you. I will take your keys from you rather than let you drive home drunk. I will sit there while you confide in me that you had an abortion at age 17. But I will chastise you when you sit there at age 40 and tell me that you are working for an organization that will take away a woman's right to choose to terminate her pregnancy.

I can play a waitress, a clown, a maid, a lawyer, a soccer Mom, a nurse or a nun. I will not play a prostitute, a stripper or a rape victim. I would, however play a model for Picasso (if I lost some poundage ahead of time). Oh, the things we do for art. Who does she think she is? Anyone I choose to be today because I am an Actor.

Tomorrow is Another Day!

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I am constantly amazed how my life can be down one day and up the next. I was not feeling well, no energy, flu symptoms, etc. Then I had an opportunity to go to Las Vegas. I needed to get out of Dodge so to speak. My brother lives in Vegas and I always look forward to seeing him.

Well, the weather was beautiful and our hotel was lovely. I met the hospitality maid in my room and we had a lovely conversation in Spanish. I found out that she is from Cuba. I gambled a little and won some money. New headshots, here we come! My brother & I spent the day together and that is always fun. And he surprised me with comp tickets to see Jubilee! We had the best seats in the house and the show was amazing.

My friends are doing some amazing projects and they always inspire me to step up my game. My polio support friends are going through their own tribulations and they also inspire me to know when to work and when to rest. I am grateful for their friendship and guidance.

My husband is so generous. He works hard and tells me to have a good time in Vegas. When I surprised him with our Jubilee tickets he was so happy. It was nice to see him relaxing and having a good time at the show. In case you have never seen Jubilee, it is a topless show. I don't think I've ever seen that many topless women ever. And I went to an all girl high school!

I think a quick trip to Vegas was well in order and just what the doctor ordered. Whenever I get depressed and sad I need to remind myself that tomorrow is another day! Thank you, Jesus for beautiful weather, a wonderful brother, my generous husband and dear friends.

Next week, new headshots with the wonderful photographer Johnny Pena.

Vat a Day!

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Filming all day is not as easy as it looks, people! I had the most amazing day and all I can do is say thank you. This has been a very memorable day for me. I normally write by my lonesome. And once in awhile I get to perform my own pieces. But today I was part of the production team. I had a walkie talkie. I was helping, where needed. I restocked the food and beverages for the actors, crew members and others. All these little details that are a normal part of production. Everyone running around like little ants working away on our mutual project. At times people would run into each other. Orders are given and assistants are running. It was so exciting.

I was doing things like making sure there was creamer and sugars for coffee. Ordering pizzas, making sure there was tissue paper in the lavatories. All that fun stuff. I tried to always make myself available. I was not in the film, but my car is. Good little car and glad I got her washed yesterday!

I think I like being behind the camera. It's good to be part of a team. I feel useful again and it feels so good. Just think, a month ago I was so depressed thinking no one wanted me or needed me anymore. And now it feels so good to be part of a team of professionals.

Tomorrow I get to sleep in and rest. Yay!

New Day, New Gig

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I'm paying my dues, people. I have been hired to work as an intern for a production company in Los Angeles. Intern, unpaid assistant who is learning on the job. Production companies do pre-production, production and post production. That means everything from doing research, making phone calls, putting a team together, faxing items, doing gopher work and a million details to pulling it all together. I have worked production before and while it can be rewarding, it can be a thankless job.

I have been doing this for the last 3 weeks. I must say it is exciting to drive onto the lot of a large studio in Hollywood and go to work. I am learning quite a bit and am thankful for this opportunity.

Tomorrow we begin filming a webisode. I hope it all goes well. I was trying to contribute here and there, where needed. I don't feel like my job is all that important. And that is difficult for me because I am a take charge kind of gal. But I am in the learning phase so I just keep my mouth shut, and learn all that I can. It is important to have a good team attitude and we must all work together for the good of a good project.

As an actor there are so many responsibilities. Learning your lines, learning your marks, following directions and performing. Being in front of the camera. Being behind the camera is important, too. While not seen, it is important to help others be their best so we can put together a great project. That is what I keep telling myself.

My job, I am told is to be at the head post. To be at the main control center, with walkie talkie in hand. Why then do I feel like my job is passing out the gatorade to the team? Oh ego, get out of my own head. When the quarterback makes the touchdown, the whole team wins. And whoever looks at the gatorade guy anyway? Isn't it more important to be a part of the winning team?